Congratulations Kagiso ubaba kaMvelo [The Queen]

In the last instalment of Rewind Mzansi, The Queen had ended on a cliff-hanger with Kagiso awaiting baby Mvelo’s DNA test results. When Sgaqagaqa finally took the test results letter from a wide eyed Shaka, he did not know that this was a major turning point in his relationship with Goodness.

From rags to riches

After finding out about the fake immune booster juice, Jackal was conflicted: does he tell the other investors and risk losing Thato, or keep quiet and endure the sharp, gnawing teeth of guilt? Solly paid out hefty dividends to his investors and, as such, Jackal remained as mute as a TV on silent mode. Money has that effect on people. Georgina who had taken out a bank loan, withdrawn her pension and pumped the entire inheritance of her unborn babies into Pfuka juice was probably the biggest winner. Using her dividends, she bought herself a car which she unveiled to friends, workmates and family. But among the cheering bystanders, Vuyiswa expressed her doubts about the miracle juice that had made paupers into royalty overnight. What if it was not legitimate? Sis Patronella dismissed Vuyiswa’s misgivings as jealousy.

Vuyiswa investigates Pfuka

It is the nature of police to suspect everyone of wrongdoing; if you take selfies near a bank, you’re planning to rob it, if you’re driving a car, show us your license and if you have a top selling health drink, then that stuff must be fake. Vuyiswa did not hide her suspicion of business malpractice with Solly’s Pfuka juice. When she demanded to see his business papers, Solly instead offered compliments and a free meal, which is the sort of thing the hired girlfriends he sleeps with would fall for. But Vuyiswa’s conviction record is no fluke. She wasn’t falling for his tricks. She is having the Pfuka juice tested by the police laboratory.

Get out of my house

We waited the entire weekend to find out the truth about Mvelo’s paternity. It would be cruel to tease you any further. The DNA results said there was zero percent possibility of Kagiso being the father. Zero; as unlikely as Cyril Ramaphosa being related to Donald Trump. Zero; the likelihood of Sunday Nkabinde sleeping with Beyoncé Knowles-Carter.

At first Kagiso was in shock, denial – “it can’t be!” – and then anger replaced the doubt and denial. He threw Goodness’ belongings into a suitcase. Harriet too wanted Goodness gone, but the headstrong Mabuza woman wouldn’t budge. She seemed certain that Kagiso was Mvelo’s father.

First there was Kamina and Jean Pierre who turned out to be a stolen child. Then Siyanda’s fake pregnancy and now Goodness and Mvelo of unknown paternity. How does a man get duped by three women in one lifetime? Kagiso began to look for the answer to this question at the bottom of one bottle of alcohol, and the next and the next. Having found only misery with no answers, Kagiso turned his rage onto Goodness. He slid under Goodness’ vehicle and cut the brake line. Soon after Kagiso had turned the car into a death trap, Goodness, pulling a suitcase behind her, emerged from the Khoza mansion. She loaded her daughter and luggage into the car and drove off.

Meanwhile, Harriet had instructed Shaka to quietly take care of Goodness, and I don’t mean giving her a pedicure.

An honest mistake

When Harriet took it upon herself to personally collect the DNA test results, it seemed that she had influenced the outcome of the test. She hates Goodness that much. But, plot twist. A remorseful looking doctor arrived at the Khoza mansion with apologies and an envelope. There was a mix-up at the laboratory. Harriet opened the envelope to find out what Goodness already knew. Kagiso is the father.

The first thing that Harriet should have done is call off Shaka’s murder plans. But she rang Kagiso whose phone happened to be on silent. When Kagiso eventually arrived, he received the good news. He phoned Goodness wanting to share the DNA test results. And then Goodness, on the other end of the line began to scream. She had lost control of her car. Kagiso’s bulging eyes betrayed the guilt he carried. He had endangered Goodness and his daughter.

Is Goodness alive?

Baby Mvelo survived. Perhaps it is God’s way that babies somehow survive second-hand smoke, nine months inside an alcoholic mother’s uterus and car crashes. But Goodness didn’t share Mvelo’s good luck. She lay in a hospital bed, comatose. When Kagiso brought Mvelo home, he made it clear that he wanted nothing to do with Harriet who he blamed for everything. It was she who had chosen the incompetent laboratory.

Goodness would later wake up from her coma and was well on her way to a full and remarkable recovery. Only Wolverine of X Men fame recovers that quickly from internal injuries. As Kagiso waited to see Goodness, Brutus managed to talk the anger out of his nephew. When Kagiso returned home, he apologized to Harriet, proving that Brutus isn’t just the weird uncle.

Goodness Mabuza’s Wolverine like recovery was short lived. As Kagiso visited with her, she abruptly began to convulse. The nurses pulled Kagiso away before shutting the curtains around Goodness’ bed, leaving us wondering if it was curtains for Zendande Mfenyana’s role on The Queen.

Mzansi Magic blunder

Last week, The Queen cut to a commercial break, 20 minutes into the show. There followed a series of adverts which lasted over five minutes. And that was the last we saw of that night’s instalment of The Queen. If an apology was later issued by Mnet, then I must have missed it.

DSTV subscriptions are not a joke. We deserve to be respected.

Till next week, my pen is capped.

Jerà

The Queen airs at 9:00pm on Mzansi Magic and is also available on Showmax.

Image from Twitter

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