Deadbeat dad returns

How to deal with a deadbeat dad

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Apart from their disappearing acts, absent fathers have one thing in common; they all return just when the child they abandoned has come to terms with their absence. Trust me on this one, I’ve done the research. But why do deadbeat fathers find their way back?

Harriet goes legit

The death of Kea was the turning point for Harriet. For several years, Kagiso, the oddball of the family, had been pushing for Harriet to leave the drug business and operate a legitimate enterprise. But when Kagiso finally got his wish, the Khozas found their first week of legitimacy as tough as co-parenting a child with a deadbeat partner.

Despite making several phone calls, Kagiso only managed to secure one client. You would think that the Khoza Trucking Company had kept actual clients as a front for their drug empire. But that’s drug dealers for you, I suppose. They never seem to expect that the hot spring from which dirty money gushes can dry up anytime.

All the while, Shaka, who only half-heartedly agreed to get out of the drug trade — much like a deadbeat father reluctantly agreeing to attend the child’s prize giving ceremony— was moaning about Harriet giving up on “their father’s legacy.” Dude, a drug business is not a legacy, it’s a shameful smear on the family name!

Case closed

After framing Jaros and killing him, Hector quickly moved to remove whatever residual doubt that remained in Vuyiswa’s inquisitive mind. Vuyiswa sensed that Jaros was a mere pawn on the chessboard of a vast underworld business. She began to audit his affairs in search for the higher power to whom Jaros reported. To throw her off his trail, Hector Sebata got his daughter Thando to plant evidence in Jaros’ safe which he kept, of all places, under the kitchen sink. And there I was thinking that black people only keep old supermarket carrier bags under the sink.

The kitchen sink safe revealed evidence that Jaros was top dog of his drug business. To really convince Vuyiswa to let go off the Jerry Maake shooting, Sebata also planted a fake hit list of Jaros’ kill targets; Jerry Maake, Vuyiswa, Harriet Khoza and Hector Sebata. And Sebata should get a SAMA for the manner in which he faked gratitude:

“You saved my life” he said to a gullible Vuyiswa.

I’m still trying to decide whether this showed Sebata’s ability to lie, or Vuyiswa’s ineptitude as far as judging character.

Patronella takes blood money — again

Slay Cop, Warrant Officer Georgina overheard Lieutenant Colonel Sebata’s phone conversation with his daughter. The commanding officer was on the hunt for a house helper. Georgina’s ears pricked up like a police dog’s because it just so happens her mother, Patronella, has been out of work for months. Georgina put in a good word for Patronella and Hector hired her, which is ironic because Georgina worked so hard to convince her parents to quit their jobs on moral grounds. Both Mjekejeke and  Patronella Zulu lived off the drug money paid to them by Harriet and Gracious. The Khozas have now gone legitimate and Gracious died, which sealed the blood money faucet from where the Zulus drank. Patronella, it seems, is doomed to work for drug dealers all her life.

Ayeye reunion

Shaka was drinking alone at the Blue Moon Lounge when in walked the beautiful Sebata sisters. The younger of the girls, Mpho, immediately took a liking to the mysterious man drinking by himself. Big sister Thando was less impressed. But Shaka turned on the Khoza charm. With Mpho taking a bathroom break, Shaka seized the moment and suggested that they go home together. There was no argument from Thando. Kanjalo nje! Moments later they entered Shaka’s bedroom where Thando slammed him onto the mattress before straddling him. Talk about a girl who knows what she wants and goes for it. This is not the first time that Sthembiso Khoza and Jessica Nkosi have acted alongside one another. Remember the Bomb Shelter produced show Ayeye?

Deadbeat dad returns

Thato and Vuyiswa had just concluded Jerry Maake’s “after tears” party and laid fresh flowers on his grave. And then a half forgotten face appeared before Thato’s eyes. Thato’s deadbeat dad, appropriately named Jackal Mkhondo. So long has he been away from his son’s life that Thato uses his mother’s maiden name – Maake – rather than Mkhondo. Needless to say, Thato gave the deadbeat father a chilly reception before asking him to leave.

When Jackal would not go away, Thato arranged for Schumacher and Mjekejeke to rob and mug him at the Maake home using toy pistols. Bad idea. The Jackal overpowered them both before inviting them to sit down for beers. When Vuyiswa arrived on the scene she reached for her handcuffs with intent to arrest them both for attempted burglary. But the timid Mjekejeke spilled the beans. “Thato sent us!” The snitch!

After Thato’s unorthodox attempt to eject his deadbeat dad from the Maake home, Jackal realized that he was truly unwelcome. He packed his bags. And then dropped the bomb on Thato.

“I have cancer, I’m dying.”

It doesn’t matter how deep the anger runs but when someone tells you they are dying, your cold shoulder immediately thaws.

Deadbeat fathers always return; for closure, for curiosity – they want to see how their child turned out – and to make up for lost time. Whether Jackal deserves Thato’s forgiveness remains to be seen.

Till next week, my pen is capped


The Queen airs weekdays at 9:00pm on Mzansi Magic

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