Mjekejeke punished for NOT cheating

Two weeks ago, the whole continent called for the erection of a statue of Mjekejeke – real name Sipho Manzini – for being the only man in Africa to refuse a woman’s sexual advances. In case you missed that episode – because shed happens – Lisbeth, the new Corner House waitress practically served herself on a platter, garnished with lettuce, but Mjekejeke refused the main course and dessert! Mjakes would be foolish to think his faithfulness was enough to keep his domineering wife happy.


Trouble at Khoza trucking


The Khozas have been expecting a shipment of cocaine from Colombia via Durban port. There were delivery problems and Harriet sent a driver down to Etekweni to collect the drugs. But before the driver arrived, Harriet’s consignment was seized by the police. The driver got away but Harriet was worried that she had been sabotaged. Having failed to reach Hector Sebata (she needed his help getting the drugs to Joburg) Harriet naturally assumed that it was he who had tipped off Durban police about the drugs. When Harriet went to look for Hector at his home, she was welcomed by the naïve Mpho who knows nothing about her father’s drug business. Mpho said Hector had gone away with “that witch” Vuyiswa. When Harriet probed, Mpho told her that Vuyiswa had arrested her father. Harriet’s ears cocked like a drug sniffer dog.
Brutus and Shaka stormed the Sebata house expecting to confront Hector but only found Thando who didn’t know where her father was exactly. All she knew was that he had gone on a retreat with Vuyiswa.
Harriet sent Brutus to interrogate Schumacher about the goings on in the Sebata home. Schumacher was evasive, if not deceitful. But after Brutus heard (from a cop he met at the bhusha) that Vuyiswa had arrested Hector on suspicion of murder of Thato and Jerry Maake, the Khozas went back to Schumacher. With Brutus’ knife in his face, Schumacher spilled the beans, well, just half of the beans. Schumacher told Harriet about Vuyiswa trying to get him to snitch on Hector but he conveniently withheld the part where he also mentioned the Khozas as Hector’s drug business associates. For now, Harriet has managed to mollify the restless clients who include the perennially dissatisfied Jasmine and the ever impatient Dollar.


When Hector eventually returned, Harriet ambushed him in the car park at Noma’s. With Harriet’s gun a couple of feet from his forehead, Hector denied the sabotage.

 

Apart from putting out fires in her empire, Harriet also has the problem of an over eager niece, Olerato, who knows about the family business and wishes to join the trade. Apparently the Khoza drug business is all over the internet. Harriet, who has already lost Kea to the drug trade, has forbidden her niece from going anywhere near a packet of icing sugar, let alone cocaine.


Mjekejeke refuses side chick

Two weeks ago, Mjekejeke bolted from Lisbeth’s home after she made a less than chaste proposal. Meanwhile, Patronella had gone from overbearing wife to an affectionate lover.
On the day that Mjakes went to fix Lisbeth’s oven – which, as it turned out didn’t need any fixing at all – Patronella went to her husband’s favourite spots to look for him but didn’t find him. She began to suspect that he was cheating. Mjekejeke was evasive when she asked why he had disappeared on her. But Schumacher, the perfect wing man, told Patronella that Mjekejeke had taken on extra shifts at Khoza trucking in order to save money for all the things she wanted. The mention of money immediately put Patronella in a good mood. She found Mjekejeke at the Corner House. Unlike the last time when she embarrassed him in front of the whole world, she was very affectionate towards him. Meanwhile, Lisbeth was hawking the couple through her jealous eye.
Lisbeth caught Mjakes without Patronella and proposed that he takes her for a second wife. She didn’t even need Musa Mseleku’s help. Mjekejeke wriggled away. But Schumacher advised him to make himself clear. Tell her you are not interested. Emboldened by Schumacher’s pep talk, Mjekejeke took Lisbeth aside and told her in no uncertain terms that he did not have feelings for her. But she told him that he reminded her of her late husband. She began to sob. Of course, she played the wounded widow card. Mjekejeke then hugged Lisbeth to ease the pain of rejection. He should have handed her a tissue and walked away.

Mjekejeke punished for honesty


As Mjekejeke consoled the cunning Lisbeth, Patronella arrived at the Corner House. The only thing that Mjakes could say is what 99% of cheating spouses the world over say. “It’s not what it looks like.”
Despite grovelling, Patronella threw Mjekejeke out of their home. He crashed at Schumacher’s that night, which is a shocking role reversal. Schumacher, the irresponsible one, has had to seek accommodation at Mjekejeke’s house after cheating on Mpho. Next, Sis Pat brought Mjekejeke’s clothes in a black garbage bag! Which of course is a favourite prop on The Queen. Remember Harriet throwing out her mother?
I really feel sorry for Mjakes. He did something no man can achieve – resist a beautiful woman’s advances – but he still got punished for it. Now that he’s in the dog box, he might as well sleep with Lisbeth.


Till next week, my pen is capped


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The Queen airs week days on Mzansi Magic at 9:00pm

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